The Baby Bump!

Ok so the long awaited baby bump pictures are here… you will have to forgive the poorer quality, the day was hardly good for

taking pictures and I’m still new so not the best at overcoming certain difficulties.

The light wasn't what it needed to be and the focus was a little soft, but I still like the composition, and of course the subject. The baby is coming soon, so we don’t have to many more opportunities to take bump pictures. It makes me excited and nervous. Point being at least one or two more should be coming soon.

I did get to realize a really fun fact today. Even being pregnant, feeling tired and bloated and far from sexy, there are really fun ways to share intimate moments. And discovering them is some of the most fun. Now before you take it to too many awkward moments, an example is that today, while snuggling with Jenny, I lightly rubbed her belly, and thus I was able to cuddle my baby!

 

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Death by Duck…

Rather than nagging and nitpicking—which is like being nibbled to death by a duck—express your dislikes in ways that don't rankle and threaten and lead to even bigger blowups.  -Dennis Rainey

I really liked this quote, it seems to be a really good description of nagging. Thankfully I do not have a wife that nags. Yet as Sammy comes closer to being born I am left to wonder how easy it would be to allow the marriage to fall into little biting comments back and forth over unmet expectations.

I believe that most marriages today that suffer, suffer from a lack of intentionality. There is no intentional building up done. It seems like we hope to coast on the past and make it through brand new struggles. It doest work.

If there is something in your marriage, or any relationship, you are unhappy with; be intentional. Communicate and work on it. Other wise your passive lack of action, your “subtle reminders”, and your flat out refusals will eat your marriage one bite at a time.

Do not think that simply communicating how YOU are unhappy will make the difference either. While that communication is vital, if you are drawing on the relationship more than your are depositing into it, your going to end bankrupt. Men complain about lack of sex… How much have you deposited into the relationship to get that kind of return on your investment? Women complain about a man’s lack of action around the house… What investment have you made into the value of your husband’s action, as opposed to just your want for it to be done?

Love covers a multitude of sins. If you are actively investing in each other, mountains turn to mole hills and the real mountains are traversed together rather than in opposition to each other.

Beyond anything else. Men, please pray with your wives. Openly and honestly revealing fears, hurts, and confidence in God. Pray from a raw and honest heart hand in hand with your spouse. We draw closer to each other as we draw closer to God.

So be intentional and don’t nibble away your marriage like one of these guys…

Tired…

So i got my job at Sears. Which is a huge praise report. I’m working as a sales man in the home appliances section. I have been very impressed with the customer centered attitude Sears functions off of.

Today was my first full day on the floor, and while I am still training, I was able to sell a few items today. It was actually really exciting.

The most important part is that I am able to contribute some to our income, and hopefully help bring us around a bit.

On that note. Jenny is still way pregnant. She has been having some Braxton-Hicks today. A lot of them she says. I keep looking for the baby to drop, hasn’t yet but I don’t think it will be very long.

I’m excited to be a Dad. I just really hope whatever needs to happen goes on and happens and I can get a job ministry related, or get back to school or something. I hate this feeling that my life is eking by and not amounting to much.

Well, it is late and I closed tonight, so this one is going to be short and sweet. Tonight’s picture was just me playing with my new shutter release. It isn’t the greatest of shots, but I enjoy the colors, and I hope you do too.

Disappointment

(Pardon the break from Point Man but…)

 

And thus the football season comes to an ugly end. What about the Super Bowl? What SUPER bowl?

Even the announcers were saying the Bears coaching staff and players choked, and while they may not say it, that hands the other team the game. The Jets? It is the division championship and you sleep the first half away. Then your coaching staff makes critical mistakes and to top it all off, the refs lay everything against you and fail to see penalties for you. Pittsburg didn't win, New York lost.

It has been this way almost every game I have been able to see this season. Not a good year.

I hope Miami keeps Henne at QB and drops the Henne at Offensive coordinator. It is the only chance they have. They really could be a very good team.

I got a Miami jersey this year so hopefully when they come back and shock the NFL I’ll be prepared….

I climbed that mountain. Hopefully my Miami hopes will be easier to accomplish.

Error comes with distance…

That is Steve Farrar’s first principle in being a father (see Point Man). Error comes with distance. Shooting from a greater distance becomes progressively harder and bowling from the regulation line is harder than from 10 feet away. We make errors the further removed we become from something.
It is the same in being a father. Physical distance from our children; lack of quantity of time spent together will cause serious errors in our ability to father. Emotional distance is even worse.
How many men can relate to a father who was around, but never really with them? Too many.
Farrar goes on to talk about the biggest challenge facing many men today being adultery.  He identifies the beginning stages and the hard questions to ask. Finally he comes to the point where he says what I have heard from many others, “if you ever feel like it won’t, it can’t be you, it will be. Pride comes before the fall.”
Farrar talks about men finding marriage a prison and viewing adultery as a fast way out. He then warns that only obedience to God will get us out of that prison. I agree with him completely. Adultery accomplishes nothing but a broken, shattered life.

Where are the mourners?
Where are the tears?
Why are we left with nothing but fears?
Why can’t they see,
How horrible it will be
to watch the death of another family?

A Father’s Role Model

Steve Farrar’s Point Man has been my object of study recently. I was excited to receive it from my in-laws  and more that interested with Samuel being due in February.
If you are unaware Point man is about male leadership in the family and I plan on sharing some of it’s insights as I go along.
Farrar says that satan has two main goals in attacking the family. #1 is to alienate the husband and wife from one another, strategy #2 is to alienate the father from his children. As far as I cant tell both strategies are working extremely well.
Farrar goes on to say that most men are unaware of what our role really is. Even when a man stands in his family, he seems lost as to what he is standing for. Farrar says our job is, “to save the boys.” I agree. I have always believed that men are the key to the family. God’s model for building healthy families is based around the leadership of a healthy, Godly, father.
The model in place from Adam and Eve until the industrial revolution was large amounts of time spent, father with son, in an apprentice type relationship. In this way being a man of God and a Father is taught by role model.  Farrar goes on to say;

I had five goals for saving my boys. It was (and still is) my job as their father to model for them the importance of:

• Knowing and obeying Jesus Christ
• Knowing and displaying godly character
• Knowing and loving my wife
• Knowing and loving my children
• Knowing my gifts and abilities so i can work hard and effectively in an area of strength, rather than weakness, contribute effectively to the lives of others – and have a little fun at the same time.

I really like Farrar’s list and his analysis of the situation. Point Man is an older book and so his point is only more so made by the trends of time. It is vital that father’s model for their children and spend not just quality, but a good quantity of time with them.
Your being a successful businessman will do nothing for your children. Your being a successful father will.

The picture for today picks up on the masculinity in this post, I hope you enjoy!

Point Man…

Imagine your in the middle of a war. You’ve been selected as your squad’s point man. That means your in the lead, scouting and taking the risks as they come. It is your job to make sure every one is safe. No traps, no mines, no ambushes. Every step might take you into enemy hands. You know they are in the area. In fact, intelligence says they are all over. You know it could any step that has you under fire, and that eventually that step will come. Can you keep every one safe?

Now imagine you aren't leading soldiers, but your family. It is your spouse and your children huddling behind you. Welcome to the job of a husband.

I’m reading the book Point Man right now, and this is very much like how it starts. I look forward to the book, especially with fatherhood coming up. I have always known being a father is a huge deal, and the responsibility is a little intimidating.
I did not have a good example of this growing up, so a good bit of it is going to be trying to learn it on the go. I believe whole heartedly that men are the key to the family. I hope to be a good one.







The picture for today is a remake of one that has been on here before, but it so fits the feel of what I am talking about so well that I wanted to share again.

Pure effort.