Death by Duck…

Rather than nagging and nitpicking—which is like being nibbled to death by a duck—express your dislikes in ways that don't rankle and threaten and lead to even bigger blowups.  -Dennis Rainey

I really liked this quote, it seems to be a really good description of nagging. Thankfully I do not have a wife that nags. Yet as Sammy comes closer to being born I am left to wonder how easy it would be to allow the marriage to fall into little biting comments back and forth over unmet expectations.

I believe that most marriages today that suffer, suffer from a lack of intentionality. There is no intentional building up done. It seems like we hope to coast on the past and make it through brand new struggles. It doest work.

If there is something in your marriage, or any relationship, you are unhappy with; be intentional. Communicate and work on it. Other wise your passive lack of action, your “subtle reminders”, and your flat out refusals will eat your marriage one bite at a time.

Do not think that simply communicating how YOU are unhappy will make the difference either. While that communication is vital, if you are drawing on the relationship more than your are depositing into it, your going to end bankrupt. Men complain about lack of sex… How much have you deposited into the relationship to get that kind of return on your investment? Women complain about a man’s lack of action around the house… What investment have you made into the value of your husband’s action, as opposed to just your want for it to be done?

Love covers a multitude of sins. If you are actively investing in each other, mountains turn to mole hills and the real mountains are traversed together rather than in opposition to each other.

Beyond anything else. Men, please pray with your wives. Openly and honestly revealing fears, hurts, and confidence in God. Pray from a raw and honest heart hand in hand with your spouse. We draw closer to each other as we draw closer to God.

So be intentional and don’t nibble away your marriage like one of these guys…